I am a wife. I am married to a man who puts his family before himself and who leads his family courageously. Since I met him nearly eight years ago, I knew he was someone I needed in my life. I want to love him more. I want to show him how much I love and care for him. But there are days where I am just so overwhelmed.
I am a daughter, a daughter-in-law, a sister-in-law, and an aunt. I have an amazing family whom I love dearly. I always wanted to be a part of a big family growing up, but my family remained pretty small compared to most – so I cherish each of these titles. I want to make them proud. But I’m overwhelmed.
I work full time, evenings and weekends too, but that’s the way it goes sometimes. However, I love my job and I thoroughly enjoy what I do. But I’m overwhelmed.
I am a church volunteer. I have always wanted to serve. I love ministry. I love walking beside my husband and serving our God. I want to love people. I want to lead people. I want to minister to people. I don’t want to let them down. But I can’t do it all. I’m so overwhelmed.
I am a writer. I have always loved writing. Since I was a young child I knew I wanted to write. Short stories, blog posts, poems … it didn’t matter unless I was writing. Here I am – and I haven’t written in a long time. Why? Not because I don’t want to anymore, or because I have nothing to say. I’m overwhelmed.
I am a child of the King. I study His Word, pray to Him, live for Him. But I keep failing. I keep breaking my promises. I keep running. I’m so overwhelmed.
Overwhelmed. Overwhelmed. Overwhelmed. The word that plagues my mind everyday. The word that knocks on the door of my heart, longing to come in and take control. The word that leaves me feeling like a failure, empty, useless, broken for all the world to see.
In amongst all of these burdens lately, I had the absolute joy of seeing Elevation Worship at our church last week. “The King is Among Us” is undoubtedly my favorite song off of their new cd. I feel like these words are in my soul right now:
We need Your revival
Holy Spirit fire
Burning ever brighter
In our souls
Kings and kingdoms falling
Hear your people calling
King of Kings we need a miracle
And so, it happened this morning. I just couldn’t hold back the tears any longer. I sat on the side of the bathtub and just cried. That’s when I laid everything at the foot of His throne once again – all of my messes, my failures, my worries. All I could do was look up. To the One who picks me up, cleans my messes, and restores. The One who will remind me once again when I cannot see past the bumps in the road who He is. What He has done. And what He will do again in my life. I am His, and I am overwhelmed by His mercy, His grace, His love, His promises.
I am in need of a revival in my heart & soul so that I can be less overwhelmed and more of who I am meant to be.