A Merry Christmas, Indeed

Wowzers! I don’t know how I let it happen – again! My last post was nearly three months ago. I promise to make a better effort to write more frequently – especially now that we have something to write about…

We are very excited to announce that we are choosing to grow our family through adoption. In no way is this a ‘backup plan’ to an otherwise failed attempt to have a family, but rather, following in the direction that we believe God is leading. There’s no denying that my blog grew quiet over the last year, and while it wasn’t intentional, it definitely allowed us the time to step back and listen.. and how we listened. I find it so incredibly amazing that we are doing this. If you knew me at the very beginning of our journey, you would know how callused my heart was to the idea of adoption.  At the very mention of it, I immediately dismissed the notion. I didn’t want someone else’s failed attempt at parenting to be my band-aid to an incredibly deep wound in my heart and soul.

I’ll never forget something I heard last Christmas from a pastor of our church – “one of the greatest miracles Jesus still performs is the transformation of the human heart” – and how that resonated in my heart. I prayed over that very sentiment day in and day out.. week in and week out. Truth be told, I can’t pinpoint an exact date on the calendar, but what I can tell you is that He has answered my plea.

The first several conversations that we had back and forth were awkward, and a feeble attempt at trying to figure out if this was the right move for us or not. Many (many) nights, I laid awake asking God to let me know if this was what we were meant to do. My husband has received more obvious signs that would only pinpoint something in our hearts to keep us pressing onward. For me though,  it’s quite the opposite; my prayer over this entire journey is that if the path that we are pursuing is not what God wants over our lives, He simply needs to redirect us. We will go where He follows – and for me, I know we are on the right path because of the undeniable peace that fills my heart. For the first time in nearly six years, I can envision our spare bedroom being transformed into a room where a child can play, learn, grow, and never once question if he or she is loved. I can’t tell you how much I already love the child that will hopefully one day {soon} occupy that room.

I am sure that over time along this next step that I will get scared, I will get frustrated, and maybe hurt – but the desire that we have to follow God’s will in growing our family is greater than that.

It was an absolute joy sharing the news with our family today. We don’t have specifics on a potential match yet, but we have selected our agency, our dates are set for classes and our home studies start soon. We are so thankful that God has spoken to us so vividly surrounding this portion of our journey and can’t wait to see how it turns out!

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Wishing you and yours a very Merry Christmas, and all the very best this upcoming New Year has to offer!

 

 

 

 

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